Finally, the part you’ve all been waiting for!

Just a quick disclaimer: I have written this story down to the best of my abilities! Labor is an intense process for a woman, and it is easy to get timelines a little confused along the way, especially after a certain point in that process. The bulk of this was typed up when I was a few days postpartum, so I am pretty certain of its accuracy, but wanted to make sure you were aware that I could have made a few minor mistakes here and there in the order of small events or the exact timing of each step.

My husband and I went to my 39 week checkup at the birth center at 3:45pm on Tuesday, June 13th, 2023. (I was due on June 16th.) I had woken up that morning feeling a little weird and thought maybe something might be happening (lots of discharge, cramping, and pelvic pain and pressure), but things petered out and I was actually struggling with thinking that Baby Boy would never come and I’d be the first woman to just be pregnant forever!

We went to that appointment and I had the midwife check my cervix for the first time — I just wanted to know if all the discomfort I had been feeling was even doing anything. (The cramping had gone off and on for days but was clearly not contractions.) She checked me and said I was 2-3 centimeters dilated, 50% effaced, and at minus 2 station. She also performed a membrane sweep, which was not the most comfortable thing ever, but wasn’t nearly as bad as I had heard from online forums. I felt crampy afterwards, but figured it was just from the membrane sweep and that it would fade away soon. Baby Boy was also SUPER active after that and my husband and I both had to do counter pressure against his kicks/pressing against my ribs and belly in the car on the way to my mother in law’s house. We picked our daughter up there and came home. I felt like I needed to soak in the tub with some epsom salts since I was still cramping, and stayed in there probably 30 minutes or so. 

Instead of the cramps fading out like I thought they would, they increased and I became suddenly aware that I might be experiencing contractions. I got out of the tub, put on my pajamas, and nestled onto our bed. It was about 6:00 pm at this point. I downloaded an app on my phone and started tracking my contractions. At that point, they were just under a minute long and were about 3 minutes and 45 seconds apart. I continued to track for about an hour and a half while I pretty much laid on the bed and breathed through them. I got up periodically to move around, and even got in the shower at one point, to try to keep them going. I had some spotting and lost a chunk of my mucus plug during this process, as well. They continued to get longer, stronger, and closer together.

We called the midwife somewhere around 7:15-7:30pm to let her know what was happening and she asked if I was comfortable with laboring at home for a while longer or if I wanted to come in to the birth center; she was genuinely happy to do whatever I desired. I told her that I wanted to stay home for a bit and just see how things went. She said to call and come in when I felt anything change, or if I just wanted to come in. My husband fed our daughter dinner and packed up her things to spend the night with my in-laws. My mother-in-law came over and picked up our girlie around maybe 7:45pm-ish and prayed over me before she left. Part of me was sad to see our daughter leave, but I also didn’t want her to see me in pain.

Not too long after they left, probably around 8-8:30pm, I felt a distinct pop and realized that my water had broken. It wasn’t coming out in a gush, but more of a steady trickle. After that, my contractions became distinctly more intense and I started being more vocal throughout them, but still felt very in control of my breathing and my thoughts and emotions.

We got to the birth center around 8:30-9pm, and went back to our room. I remember waddling back to the room as quickly as I could between contractions. I wanted to get into that birth tub!

I actually hadn’t met this midwife before; the birth center I went to had several midwives on staff and I had met most of them throughout my prenatal care, but hadn’t met this woman before. She couldn’t have been sweeter and I am so grateful she was the one on call that night because her personality and demeanor were exactly what I needed.

She checked me and I was 4 cm dilated. I remember being slightly disappointed with that number, but I didn’t allow myself to be discouraged. After all, this labor was already progressing much faster than my first, and without any prodromal labor beforehand to boot!

I labored on the bed while my midwife checked on baby, checked my vitals, and filled up the birth tub, and then I promptly climbed into the warm water. It was instantly comforting to me. I labored there for a good while, probably an hour or so (though I’m not sure how long exactly because I started losing track of time at this point). The contractions grew in their intensity and while I was completely calm and lucid during the time between them, I had to focus completely to get through each one.

Things started to really pick up regarding the pain I was feeling and I felt the need to move to the bed. And that is the only regret I have in this birth story. The birth assistant and my husband helped me to the bed, and that is when I started struggling with the pain far more than before; I felt myself starting to panic, when I had previously not felt that way at all. I didn’t want the pain to get on top of me, but I could feel it beginning to… and I didn’t want that to happen like it did for the bulk of my first labor.

I asked for nitrous oxide and it was one of the best decisions we made throughout the entire labor. While nitrous oxide does not act as a pain reliever, it does help you to relax and get into an almost dream-like state where you just detach a little bit. Your reaction time slows, and I can definitely attest to this as it would take me longer than normal to respond to people’s questions! I was still aware of my contractions and definitely moaned (yelled?) through them and was glad that the nitrous mask, well, masked my “labor song”. The midwife checked me again somewhere in this time frame and I was at a 6. I remember her saying after checking me that second-time moms breeze through the active labor stage, but I had a hard time believing that I would be at a 10 anytime soon. I remember mentally rolling my eyes. Yeah, right. Me, breeze through labor? No, ma’am, I’ll be here for a while.

Eventually, after laboring on the bed for what felt like forever (but was actually probably only an hour or so), I felt like I needed to use the restroom so my birth assistants helped me into the bathroom. I labored on the toilet for a bit and then things went a little downhill for a time.

They discovered that the nitrous oxide tank was having issues — I think the hose came unhooked from the nozzle (I was only slightly preoccupied with being in labor, you know) — so I went without it for a bit without even realizing it and started to tense up a lot more during contractions. And everyone knows that more tensing up in labor equals more painful contractions. It was then that I truly felt like I couldn’t keep going. I thought I might die in that moment, as dramatic as that sounds. But the pain was just tremendous — definitely as hard as my pitocin-induced labor with my daughter. The only way I can describe the pain as I experienced it is feeling as through your body is being ripped in two from the perineum, upwards. Gruesome, but true. I remember looking up at my husband and one point and declaring, “I am NEVER doing this again.”

They got the nitrous oxide tank working again and I started to calm down as a result. I got back into the birth tub, and between the water and the gas, I was able to stay significantly more calm and feel less out of control. I am not sure at this point how long I was in the tub… my husband says it wasn’t long — maybe 10 minutes. All I know is that I had my eyes closed the whole time, with the nitrous mask practically glued to my face, moaning and swaying through the contractions and resting as deeply as I could when they were over. I think I practically fell asleep during each break and I think they were worried I would slide under water, but I never did sleep deeply enough to let that happen.

Finally, something shifted in my body and I remember saying, “I feel like I have to push!” But in my mind, it seemed like they had just told me I was a 6 (what I didn’t realize was that this was like two hours ago), and I was scared that my body wasn’t ready and I would hurt myself trying to push too soon. The whole birth team encouraged me to listen to my body, so I just bore down and pushed.

This was where I really started to feel in control of myself again. I loved pushing because I knew what to do (having pushed a baby out once before) and I felt like I finally had full control of my body again.

I still had my eyes clamped shut with the gas on and had zero concept of time. I couldn’t have told you if I had pushed for a minute or an hour. I pushed, I’m not sure exactly how many times (maybe 2-3) and his head was visible. They told me so, and exclaimed that he had hair! I could have told them he did… my babies just have hair at birth. I pushed one more time and his head popped out. The physical relief that came along with that was incredible. I pushed again and one shoulder came through, and then I paused for a moment, gave two more pushes, and out came his whole body. What I didn’t know is that I pushed that whole 8 lb. 2 ounce baby out in exactly 2 minutes from the first push to the last. With absolutely no tearing.

They pulled the nitrous mask from me and gave me my baby instead. It was 12:04 AM on Wednesday, June 14th — only 6 hours after my contractions began and a little over 8 hours since my membrane sweep the day before.

Suddenly, the whole world felt clear again and I was holding my son with my husband next to me and a team of three wonderful women who were cheering me on. They helped clear out his lungs and I comforted him as he cried, even though it wasn’t much of a long cry. He soon settled into me, knowing that I had been his home for the last 9 months. My birth team helped out of the tub and into the bed quickly so that they could monitor my blood loss, which was at a normal level. They gave me a shot of a low dose of Pitocin to help with blood loss as a precaution and the prick of the needle felt like nothing compared to what I had just experienced. I held my tiny, newborn son and just felt so clear, so happy, and so calm. A night and day difference from my first golden hour.

My sweet husband sat next to me in the bed and we just studied our precious son together. Part of the membranes of my placenta remained attached, so the midwife gave it a few minutes and then I pushed it out fully without a problem. When I pushed out the placenta, the relief of officially not being pregnant anymore was definitely not lost on me. (Also, side note, apparently my placenta was huge. Guess I’m an overachiever.) After the cord stopped pulsating, they clamped it and my husband cut it. Not too long after this, Baby Boy was able to latch on and nurse. And he ate, and ate, and ate. My mom came to see us; due to the pandemic, she wasn’t able to meet our daughter until she was four days old, so this was also such a redemptive gift.

They checked both of our vitals and then just let us be together. Mom left and the three of us settled down into the bed to rest. The birth team came back hourly to check on Baby Boy and me, and everything continued to look healthy and well. We went home at 8 am after a brief visit with his pediatrician and that concludes my redemptive, answer-to-a-million-prayers birth story.

Everything about it was different except the pain level I eventually felt once I hit transition. Otherwise, I cannot adequately describe the ways in which God blessed me with an empowering, peaceful, beautiful GIFT of a natural labor and delivery experience. The vast difference I felt immediately after he was born was a huge answer to prayer, as well. I bonded with him immediately. Felt that rush of oxytocin. Experienced the bliss of golden hour. My body felt GREAT, so much so that I had to remember to rest and felt fully back to normal within a few weeks.

It was all such a redemptive experience, and it is a blessing that I will forever be grateful to my Heavenly Father for giving me.

I asked for bread and He gave me bread (Matthew 7:7-11). He has been so incredibly faithful, through every up and down.

Holy is His name.